It’s unbelievable. 22 months ago I brought my heavy bag, and along with a heart weighing ten times more, to the dreaded Pasir Ris place where we’re all herded into the lok kok bus that took us to the Ferry Terminal.
I came to a place where I spent 3 crazy months and didn’t actually had this “bond” which everyone relishes of their BMT in Pulau Tekong. To be honest, I felt at home, at ease and definitely much happier in my unit (read: where you’re posted to after your Basic Military Training). However, that’s another story for another day.
Counting down to the fateful day, 6th Sept, it’s ironically slower when it’s actually getting nearer. I felt that time passed significantly quicker when it passed the halfway-mark. Now that when I only have 2 months left, it crawls at a snail’s pace. Believe me, it’s true, and proven.
Maybe because of the anticipation, with a whole lot of eagerness that’s affecting my sense of time, mentally and biologically.
You really can’t blame me for feeling this way can you? There’s tons of stuffs I’m waiting to do after I ORD – going back to study, getting a temporary job to save up for that, looking up and keeping tabs for both (which I’m already into that, in fact quite a while ago), spending more time actually on myself (spiritually and physically), paying more attention to what’s actually happening to the world on a smaller scale, blogging, reading, revamp the room a little, etc. There’s just so many just to list a few.
If anyone of you knows me personally or have been reading this little space long enough (and actually understand why), I have a little bit of backlog of my life to catch up and work on.
Studying, and making sure I do it well while doing it because I like it, landing a decent job after that etc. – they all matter a lot at this point of time for me. More so now, if I must say. I’m not young anymore to be exact. I’m mature but I screw things up at times, but I’m here to make changes for myself.
Just for the record, I actually love learning and am not adverse to that, but I can be pretty stubborn (and at all cost, even if it comes heftily) when something is forced down my throat. I mean, as a guy, genetically I’m programmed to hate anything down my throat forcibly, if you know what I mean.
Well, if anything, my somewhat little setback in poly only made me yearn even more to get that record straight. It’s like knowing you didn’t do something well enough and you just can’t live with not fixing it. Sure, I most probably won’t be going back to poly – 3 years isn’t short, but there are alternatives which I am gonna go for. I’m still fixing it.
Hell, even if it’s not for myself, it’s gonna be for my gf. She’s a few years older and if we are going to commit, I guess it’s not surprising or out of place to say I am a little behind time, is it? I can’t imagine when I’m like 30 and I’m just 2-3 years into my career and I can’t even convince myself to promise her anything. I want the best for her and the both of us.
I know she doesn’t mind but I have my goals and the principles to achieve them. Maybe that’s the way I always am – living on the edge, hanging by the cliff. I’m just fan4 jian4 I guess. Haha.
Anyhow, I know I haven’t been posting often, and like I have always said, I miss you guys (as of all my friends and you guys know who you are), do check back once in a while, although recently it has been disappointing with the lack of updates. I want to complete this journey with you.
In fact, I really do see myself blogging decades more. So if you are interested to hear about my wedding (not like it’s anytime soon), see my first child and how he/she has grown, what I’m doing at work, how I’m planning on my retirement, what school my kids are attending, whether they are good kids… stay with me. :)
Also, shifting of this place hasn’t been going on of late. Therefore, seeing this site disappear won’t be anytime soon. Take care, y’all.
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